


The Prince and His Thief

by Jaysong, SparrowFlight246



Category: Hamilton-Miranda
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Eliza is basically everyone's mom, F/F, F/M, Francis ships it, Hurt and comfort, It All Ends Well, King!Alexander, Knife fights, Mary Likes sparkly things, Mild cussing, Multi, Nevis is a kingdom, Oblivious!Philip, Philip gets crowned king, Philip is a Disney princess, Polly and Susan ship it, Prince!Philip, Protective!Angelica Schuyler, Queen!Eliza, Romance, Short!Theodosia Burr Alston, Slow Burn, Stabbing, Tall!Philip Hamilton, The Schuyler family is huge, Thief!Theodosia, does that make Theo a prince?, graphic-ish descriptions, palace au, philidosia, some blood, thank god for my beta, the author doesn't know how to tag, theo is a little shit (sometimes), this is based off a dialogue prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-29
Updated: 2017-11-03
Packaged: 2019-01-06 22:49:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,901
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12220545
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jaysong/pseuds/Jaysong, https://archiveofourown.org/users/SparrowFlight246/pseuds/SparrowFlight246
Summary: Philip is the prince of Nevis, about to become king, and bored out of his mind. Theo is a commoner and a skilled thief from stealing for her family. What happens when their paths cross?Utter chaos.---Aka the Palace au written to the prompt:"Lord give me patience or an untraceable handgun."





	1. Chapter 1

"Lord give me patience or an untraceable handgun."  
\---

Crown prince Philip Hamilton considered himself a pretty regular person. Well, under all the riches. And fame. He wanted freedom. Well, he had freedom, but he wanted to leave the palace on his own. No guards, no advisors, and mostly, no _Angie_. Oh, what he would give to be free of his younger sister. In short, it'd be pretty much anything but his life.

His sister never, ever, let him do anything without her. ‘It's a phase, honey,’ his mother assured him, normally followed by a ‘she’ll grow out of it.’ 

So far? His mother had been wrong. Very, very wrong. It wasn't even cute anymore. It was creepy at this point, and Philip was hoping that Angie didn't rub off on Alex Jr., as the younger boy was starting to walk and talk, and he was already following Angie around, and by extension, following Philip around.

On top of all of his siblings’ craziness, his mother was pregnant again, meaning he’d have another kid stalking him twenty-four-seven. God, he didn't need that. He certainly hoped that this next kid liked Angie more than him. 

Sure, he loved his younger siblings. Adored them, actually. But when he never got any peace, or time alone, for that case. He tended to get annoyed. Which was probably why he’d snuck out.

It had started as an idea. He’d been sitting in a lesson, one that he just _couldn't_ focus on. No matter how hard he tried. 

_I wonder what would happen if I ran away?_ He had thought, and he’d dismissed it quickly. _No, I can't. I have duties. I’ll be king in a month._

But the idea had planted itself in his mind, and it was not leaving. _Escape from boredom! Go meet your people. The ones that aren't fortunate! Find out what you can do!_

So, he had put on the oldest, most torn clothing he owned, and wrapped a scarf around his face. He looked nothing like himself now. Or so he thought. He quickly snuck out via a secret entrance in the garden wall. It really had seemed like a good idea. At the time. As in, before he had gotten hopelessly lost. It wasn't really his fault. Why were these streets so narrow and curvy?! He, the future king of Nevis, was lost. In his own city! This was just showing how freaking stupid he was! How in the _hell_ was he supposed to rule if he got _lost_ in his own kingdom?!

He had been wandering around mindlessly, when he noticed a commotion. He drifted towards it as he heard yelling. 

“Officer! This lil’ bitch just tried to rob me!”

“No I di’n’t! I swear! I was jus’ lookin!” The perpetrator looked to be about nine, and terrified.

“Don't try to deny it! Officer, I demand you arrest her!” the shopkeeper snarled.

Wait. She looked to be about _nine_. As in, Angie’s age. As in, the shopkeeper wanted to charge a child the same way as an adult. _How often does this happen? He found himself thinking. Does it happen a lot? Should I know about this? Does dad know about this happening?!_

_How can I fix this?_

“Hey! Stop it!”

\--

Theo’s day had been going great. She had already stolen enough food to last herself, her sisters, and her brothers a week. Her dad was gone. Again. Honestly, she had no idea where he was, but that had stopped bothering her at this point. She just knew what to steal, and who to steal from, and how to not get caught. So, yes, her day was going great. Until she ran into the boy.

She had gone to find her younger brothers, finding Augustine up on top of a random roof, kissing some girl (not much of a surprise there, honestly), and she’d had to drag him away, while he cussed her out in two languages. 

John came much more willingly, considering that he’d been pickpocketing for the past three hours or so, which understandably, got boring rather easily. 

“So, Gussie,” she started, and Augustine groaned loudly at the nickname. “Who was she?”

“Just…. nobody, Dossie.”

“Uh-huh,” Theo snorted, “lets go get the girls.” 

John grinned, running off. “I know where Sally and Anne are!” He disappeared through the crowd, leaving a trail of dust in his wake.

Theo and Augustine rolled their eyes. 

“Lets go find Mary,” Augustine sighed, and Theo nodded.

Mary Louisa Bartow-Burr was always the hardest to find. She couldn't keep herself away from anything sparkly. Ever. It made Theo wonder why she let Mary go anywhere on her own. 

Theo noticed the mob outside of the jeweler’s shop, and a bundle of dread began to bloom in the pit of her stomach. 

“Gus. Go find John, Anne, and Sally. Go home. I'll meet you there, hopefully with Mary.” Theo kept her gaze trained on the mob, shoving Augustine on his way.

“Hey! Stop it!” she heard someone yell, somewhere in the back of her mind realizing she recognized the voice from somewhere.

“I di’n ‘ake any’hin’!” Oh, god in heaven. That was definitely Mary’s voice. The lisp gave it away, 

“I demand you let her go free!” The male voice was getting bossier and bossier.

Theo finally managed to shove herself to the front of the crowd, placing herself between Mary and the shopkeeper, who narrowed his eyes at her. 

“Mary,” she whispered urgently, “on five, you run.” The words were barely a breath, and Mary didn't answer, as she knew not to at this point. 

Theo held up five fingers, grabbed the boy’s wrist, and booked it. Apparently, the stranger had no clue that they were going to book it, but he started running once he knew what was happening.

“What the hell?!” he cried, running as fast as Theo.

“C’mon! This can't be your first time running from the cops!” Theo chortled, grabbing the boy’s wrist and swinging around a corner.

\--

This wasn't her first time running from authority?! Was he fraternizing with criminals now?!

“Wow, you look really surprised.” She had the audacity to be laughing at him! 

“Well yeah! I, the crown prin-”

She snorted. “You must be crazy!”

“I am the prince! Nobody calls the crown prince of Nevis insane!”

She turned to stare at him, her eyes narrow. “Lord give me patience or an untraceable shotgun!” she mumbled, dragging a hand down her face. 

Philip stared at her. She actually didn't believe him? How? Then he remembered. His face was mostly covered. 

“I can prove it!” he glared at her, and she stood there rigidly, her face still flushed with anger. 

“Go on then,” she challenged, fidgeting with a gun on her belt. Had that been there the whole time? 

Philip pulled the scarf from his face, and waited. She simply rolled her eyes.

“Yeah, ninety percent of the population has never seen the prince. Which you must know. So you could be literally anyone.” She narrowed her eyes a bit more. “You saved Mary, so I owe you something. What do you want in return?”

“I…. there’s nothing I could want,” he shrugged, and she snorted in disbelief.

“Uh-huh. You say that now, but in a week you'll be hungry, and then you'll come ask for food or some sh-” she broke off as Mary came running back, babbling in a language Philip didn't recognize.

“No, I won't. But, actually, I did think of something I need. Can you get me back to the castle?” he asked awkwardly.

She gaped at him for a moment, and turned to Mary whispering something back in the same language that Mary had spoken. Mary nodded and ran off.

“Fine, mister ‘I'm The Oh-So Important Crown Prince Of Nevis’, I'll take you to your castle. But I have a few rules. One; if you flirt with me, even a little bit, I will not hesitate to abandon you in the crowds. Two; when we get to the castle, you don't let them take me into custody. I have siblings depending on me. They will die if I'm imprisoned, and it'll be your fault, so I will blame you, and hunt you down.” 

She paused to think. “Three; if you treat me like I'm less than you, I swear on my life, I will shoot you, and leave you to bleed. Four; you do as I say. It'll keep us both alive. Got it?” Her voice was still angry, even though her face was now impassive.

“Y-yes. I can do that,” Philip answered slowly, mildly terrified by the speech. “But, ah, can I ask your name?”

“Theo,” the girl muttered.

Philip nodded, and followed her when she started walking.

“What the hell?” Theo asked, “why’re you following me right _now?_ ” She grabbed a bag from Mary, who had appeared a moment ago, and tossed an apple at Philip. “Eat your dinner.”

Mary had scuttled off, leaving Philip and Theo alone, Theo already eating her apple. 

“So, about how long will it take to get to the castle?”

Theo groaned. “Depends how fast you can run, and for how long. It can take anywhere from a few hours to a day.”

Philip blanched. How the _actual hell_ had he he gotten so far from his home?! Wow, he’d apparently gotten way too wrapped up in looking around his kingdom. He murmured his assent as Theo described the route.

“Let's get going,” Theo grumbled, beginning to lead the way through the winding, bustling streets. She abruptly turned right, walking into a store.

“Heya, Susan! Hey Polly!” Theo greeted, smiling for the first time that day.

“Whatcha want, Dosie?” One of the girls, the one with darker hair, leaned over and kissed the other girl’s cheek, her tone lazy and stance relaxed, only to have the other bat her away. 

“Polly!” She scolded, then leaned over to kiss Polly’s cheek.

“Wraps, Polly. And a knife or two. We’re gonna be walking after dark.” Philip stared as Theo covered her eyes and told the two what she wanted. She hadn't said this much to him! 

“‘Dosia, do we wanna know why?” asked the second girl, pinching the bridge of her nose between her index finger and thumb, and rubbing it. “Or at least, can you get thrown into jail for this? Because momma can't bail you out anymore.”

“And my dad won't,” Polly snorted, tossing Theo a bag.

Susan sighed and threw a bag at Philip, who barely caught it.

“Bye Dossie!” Both girls waved at Theo, “Bye random guy with Theo!”

“Wait. RandOM GUY WITH THEO?!” Polly yelled, darting in front of Theo and Philip, blocking their way out.

“I'm taking him home, Polly, Jesus!”

“Theo’s got a boyfriend and they're goin’ home.” Polly smirked and strutted all the way back to Susan.

“Get a room, all ready, you two!” Theo snarked in response, sticking her tongue out and, waving as she slipped back into the crowd. “Oh wait!” Theo crowed, “you already have!

Philip turned and saw that Susan and Polly were both blushing profusely, before following Theo.

“Y’know what?” Theo sighed, “I don't know your name.”

“Philip,” he answered easily, and she snorted.

“You really haven't been on the streets long, Have you?” she laughed, but there was no joy in it, only danger. “You never give out your real name. Use a nickname instead,” she added when she noticed his bewildered look.

Philip didn't really understand. The streets were odd and terrifying. Honestly, he couldn't wait to be home. Seeing Theo and her siblings actually made Philip miss his. He missed Angie chasing him around, watching everything he did. He missed Alex Jr trying to get him to play tag, and chase and catch every minute of the day. Hell, Philip even missed his unborn sibling.

He felt something warm and wet trail down his face, and scrubbed at his face to hide that he'd been crying.

“Pip!” Theo grabbed his wrist. “Let’s- have you been crying?” There was something strange in her gaze that hadn't been there before. Philip chalked that down to Theo having so many siblings.

“Uh…” Philip scrubbed at his face. “....no?”

“C’mon. We’ll get you home, Pip.”

“Why do you keep calling me Pip?” he asked, not meeting her gaze.

“Nicknames,” she smirked, “remember?”

“Right...,” he mumbled. 

“Let's go, Crown Prince,” Theo snorted, and started dragging him through the crowds.

Theo was getting jumpier as it got later, and Philip didn't know if Theo was aware that she was jumping at every shadow.

“I… we need to get out of this part of the city,” Theo hissed, peering into the shadows.

“Why the rush?” a velvety voice purred from the shadows, and Theo pulled the knife from her backpack.

Philip repeated the action, even though he had no clue how to use it. 

Theo leaned over to whisper, “if you can't actually do it, then baffle them with your bullshit.” She smirked at him.

Philip nodded subtly, positioning himself the same way as Theo.

\--

Theo dodged as the man lunged at her, jumping out of the way, and landing sloppily. She recovered quickly, diving towards the man, and slicing her knife across his side. In turn, his knife, (that she hadn't noticed) scraping across her cheek. She yelped, and slashed at the man-(no, she realized this was a teen, just a crazy tall teen, she was fighting) the other teen’s hand, and heard him hiss out a breath in pain. 

Theo stumbled back as his knife swept across her forehead. She stabbed her knife towards his stomach, missing and hitting his leg as he jumped. Theo could feel the blood dripping down her forehead, and knew it would only be a matter of time before it dripped into her eyes.

Her opponent slammed into her side, and she dug her knife into his arm, yanking it out, and wiping some of the blood from her forehead to keep it out of her eyes. 

Philip was watching all of this with a morbidly curious look on his face, obviously not knowing how to participate. The attacker lunged for her again, and Theo gritted her teeth before throwing herself to the left, narrowly dodging the knife.

She had noticed Philip inching towards the third person, and dismissed it as him just trying to get away. So when Philip sprang forward, she was caught off guard, allowing her opponent to thrust his knife into her side. She barely noticed with all the adrenaline in her system, but Philip was staring at her side. _Don't look_ , she reminded herself, _it'll be worse if you look._

Their opponent had taken this moment to stab his knife into Philip's stomach. Philip stumbled a few steps, then fell to his knees, and Theo froze for a second, staring in horror at the crown prince of her kingdom.

She readjusted her grip on the knife, then drove it into the opponent’s chest, her eyes widening a bit as the knife slid right past his ribs. Theo yanked at the knife the moment the holy hit his chest. Honestly, she wasn't that surprised when the knife didn't come out.

It took roughly a minute for the weight of what she’d just done to hit her, and when it did she leaned over, and released the contents of her stomach. She was never going home now. She couldn't. It would just ruin her siblings lives. 

Theo had just…. probably killed someone. There was a small chance he’d live, but right now, Theo was more worried about herself and Philip then the guy who’d just tried to kill them. She couldn't really hide the evidence if this fight, there was too much blood on the pavement, and a soon to be corpse, too. 

_Philip had better be the damned prince, or I'm gonna be executed for my crimes_. She thought nauseously. 

Theo honestly had no clue what to do. She had never had anyone get stabbed on her watch. She ripped a strip of fabric off one of the scarves she was wearing with shaking hands, and started to apply pressure to the wound, flinching when she heard Philip groan. She knew that guards were everywhere, so now she just had to find one. She knew that the adrenaline would fade soon, and that once that happened, she'd be in too much pain to find anyone.

She took a second to check herself over, wiping at the blood trickling from her forehead, then grabbing Philip’s scarf and wrapping it around her side, watching in horror as the pale grey fabric slowly changed to a bright scarlet color. She brushed her hair out of her face, gasping in pain when this pulled the wound on her side.

“Well. He got me good there,” she thought aloud, voice soft.

She touched her cheek when she felt it start stinging, and groaned. 

“Guard!” she yelled as she noticed the uniformed men walk past the alleyway she was in. She had collapsed, and was trying to, probably in vain, stop Philip from bleeding out.

“What the hell?! That's the missing prince!” one of the guards exclaimed upon seeing Philip’s face.

“Y-yeah. And he’ll bleed out in a bit,” Theo mumbled. “I don't care about m-me, right now, b-but,” she started pleadingly. “Philip… he can't die.”

“Damn right he can't die! But you can be punished for trying to kill the future king.”

“B-but- I didn't- I- what?!” Theo hissed angrily, as one guard hauled her up, and the other lifted Philip gently from the ground.

The Guard that had yanked her to her feet was binding her wrists, and grabbing her knife.

 _No. Please, no. Tell me they don't think I did this._ Theo begged internally.

“I didn't stab the damn king!” she snarled, then felt something bang into her skull before everything faded into darkness.

\--

“-the king! He’s waking!” 

Philip’s eyes started to open slowly, and he began to recognize his surroundings. The royal hospital? How the hell did I get here?

“Pip! Oh, thank god!” His mother’s arms were bundled around him before he had any time to process that she was here.

“Ah!” he groaned as the hug pulled at what he assumed were stitches. “Mom!”

“Oh honey, I was so worried!” his mother whispered, tears pooling in her eyes.

“I… Mom, I was fine.”

“Obviously you were not!” she snarled. “Some girl stabs you, and you think that you're just… fine?!”

“Theo… Theo didn't…” Philip stared at his mom. “Theo didn't stab me, mom.”

Eliza’s confused look urged Philip on.

“Mom, some guy pulled a knife on us. Theo was just bringing me home. She got stabbed too.”

“Sweetheart, you must not remember right. She was holding a bloody knife,” Eliza explained gently.

“Mother! I refuse to believe that Theo stabbed me!” Philip growled.

There was a short silence as the furious royals glared at one another, the only sound coming from servants and medics hustling from the room due to the air practically crackling with tension.

Finally, Philip couldn't stand it anymore. “Where's dad?” he asked quietly.

“Interrogating the girl,” Eliza admitted.

“Mom, dad won't ever believe that she didn't stab me,” Philip groaned. “You know how he gets.”

“Very intense,” Eliza nodded knowingly. “I'll get him outta there before he starts yelling.”

“Thanks, mom.”

“Of course,” she smiled. 

Philip sighed, and laid back on the bed. “So, did I miss anything crazy?” he asked. 

“AJ’s first word was ‘Pip’. Not, Momma like Angie, not Papa like you, but Pip.” 

“I'm gone for the day and the lil’ genius starts talking,” Philip sighed.

“I think he started talking because you weren't there, honey.” Eliza smiled at her oldest son.

“I doubt that, mom,” he laughed. 

“We- I should go and get your father,” Eliza sighed. “And I'll send your siblings in. To keep you here.”

Philip wanted to argue, wanted to saw that he'd come with her, but at this point, he knew better. He just nodded, laying back on the bed. 

Angie came rushing in, tugging Aj along.“PHILIP! YOU’RE ALIVE!” she yelled dramatically.

“And you're still loud as ever.”

“Pip!” Aj grinned up at Philip.

“Aj!” Philip smiled.

Philips siblings hurled themselves into his arms, and he caught them with an audible “oof”, but he hugged them tightly, ignoring the pain from where his stitches pulled. “Missed you two brats.”

\--

Theo officially had decided that Philip was a pompous bastard, and that he had lied to her. Sure, he'd been stabbed, but he’d been conscious when the guards found them! So now, she was stuck in the Goddamned dungeon.

And the king was yelling at her. She had tuned him out a while ago, not really caring what he was saying, just wanting him to leave so that she could find a way out.

“-TO SAY FOR YOURSELF?!” the king thundered, and Theo flinched.

“I didn't stab Ph-your son, sir.” She was completely amazed at how calm her voice was, and how devoid of emotion.

“Then how, pray tell, did you get blood all over the knife?” The king’s voice was softer now, but it still held the same terrifyingly dangerous edge as when he was yelling.

Theo shivered. “I was bringing him home. And there was a knife fight. That sort of thing is common on the streets,” she ground out, the memory of the fight destroying the false numbness she’d convinced herself to feel, and she nearly screamed as the pain slammed into her.

“Alexander, love,” a heavily pregnant woman, whom Theo quickly recognized as the queen, called as she walked slowly down the stairs. “Philip wants to speak with you-”

“Oh! Of course.” The king’s demeanor had immediately softened as the queen appeared, but that hadn't stopped him from interrupting her.

Yet she continued easily, “-Alex, you didn’t let me finish. He also wants to see her.”

“Her..? but why?” 

“Alex….” the queen let her sentence trail off, a dangerous edge entering her tone.

The king sighed loudly, and called for the guards to take Theo up to the royal hospital. She was carried in a gentler fashion this time, which came as a relief to Theo. 

Philip had said something too quietly for Theo to hear, but everyone else had obviously heard it. From what she could see, he had said it angrily enough that he had been obeyed, even with his father’s protests. 

Before she had much time to process it, Theo was in a hospital bed, and wearing a hospital gown, her knife wounds being stitched back together. She sat there as the medics stitched her back together and she barely felt the needle enter her neck before she succumbed to the lull of sleep.

_The first memory was sweet, Theo being about nine in it. Theo was walking with her father, back when they’d actually had a home, and he hadn't drank away all of their money. Her mom was cooking, John and Anne were in the courtyard, playing soldiers, Mary was on their mother’s hip, and Augustine was out with some friends._

_Theo realized that she hadn't seen her mother grab the bottle that held her pills at all today. That was a rare occurrence._

_So today was a good day for her mother, she realized, a smile sparking to life on her face._

_“What's got you smiling so big, poppet?” her father asked gently._

_“I dunno. Today’s just a good day!” she giggled._

_“What if I told you I bought caramels?” her father asked._

_“Eww!” She crinkled her nose._

_“Hey! I thought you liked caramels, Theo!” he chuckled._

_She shook her head decisively. “No,” she explained, “that was last week.”_

_“Well I guess I'm just going to have to give them to your siblings.” Her father shrugged, and she gasped._

_“You wouldn't dare!”_

_“Watch me, poppet.”_

_Theo ran into the house, grabbing her mother's apron and tugging. “Daddy won't give me any caramels!” she complained, and Theo Sr laughed weakly._

_“Theo, darling,” her mother paused to lower her head into the crook of her arm and cough, “I believe that your father offered you some.” Theodosia Sr laughed, then placed a hand on her head, rubbing her temples._

_“Theo, baby, can you take Mary out? I… I think I need to lie down,” she muttered weakly, putting Mary on the floor._

_“Yeah, sure momma. C’mon sis.” Theo grabbed the toddler’s hand, leading her outside._

_“Dada! Momma sick!” Mary had scrambled over to their father, and was now glaring at him like it was his fault._

_“I'll go check on her, sweetheart.” He promised, making his way into the house._

_The next memory was decidedly less happy._

_“Momma?” Mary was poking Theodosia sr’s face. “Papa!” she screamed._

_Theo got to the room first, realizing what had happened when she saw her sister poking their mom._

_Theo let out a loud broken sob._ No, nope. Her mom, the constant parent in her life was not dead. There was no way in hell that her mom was dead.

Theo barely registered her father’s hand on her back, pushing her from the room. Mary was shoved along with her. 

“Why di’ papa ma’ us leave?” Mary asked quietly. “Why you cry?”

“Momma’s… momma’s…” Theo’s voice broke. “M-momma’s g-gone!” she sobbed.

“Bu-bu-bu’ momma in there.” Mary raised an eyebrow at Theo. 

“Mo-momma went to hea-Heaven,” Theo choked back a sob. “She’s with the-the angels now.”

Mary’s lower lip began to tremble. “No! No! Momma ca’t go wi’t t’e angels!” she sobbed.

“She already did.” Their father's voice betrayed no emotion, even though his face showed just how shattered he really was.  
\--

Philip glanced at his parents. “You ready to hear the story? Or,” he glared at his father, “are you going to keep yelling at my friends?”

His father sighed in exasperation. “Philip, it seemed like she was the one who stabbed you, alright?”

“Fine…” Philip sighed. 

“What actually happened, though, was much different than you guys thought.” Philip took a breath, “I was bored in here. So, I found a way out. I spent most of the day wandering through the streets, getting more and more lost.”

He sighed. “Then, right when I couldn't find the castle, I heard some people yelling, and I went to check it out. A little girl, no more than nine, was about to be beaten for stealing.” Philip glanced at Theo, watching her for a moment before continuing. 

“Turns out, she was Theo’s little sister, Mary. I got in the middle of it right as Theo did. Then Theo grabbed my arm, told me to run, and booked it.”

Eliza laughed at how awkwardly Philip said the phrase, and Philip sighed again. 

“So Theo had successfully gotten me more lost, and was absolutely convinced that I had wanted something from her, so she was yelling at me. I finally asked her to get me back home, and she burst out laughing. She actually didn't believe I was the prince!” he laughed, a smile flickering across his face.

“Anyways,” he continued, “she eventually started leading me out of the city, and we stopped by a shop owned by a couple of her friends, then we kept walking, until nightfall. At nightfall we got cornered in an alley-” Philip broke of when Theo jolted up, tears streaming down her face.

“‘M fine!” she groaned, swiping at the tears staining her face. “Keep talkin’.”

Philip sighed before continuing, “and this guy came at us with a knife. I think you know the rest.”

Eliza blinked. Well, she certainly hadn't been expecting that. She hadn't known what she was expecting, but it sure as hell wasn't that.

Philip was fairly unnerved by his parents’ silence, and was beginning to fidget with his hands to hide it.

His father coughed awkwardly, and Philip turned to look at him. “Well, that's certainly some story, Philip.”

“Wouldn't’ve told you if it wasn't true,” Philip muttered.

His father nodded. “So, you said she made you promise some stuff?”

“Hell yeah I did!” Theo mumbled, pushing herself into a sitting position. The queen gave Theo a reprimanding look, leading to a, “sorry.”

“Ah, Theo? What were they again?” Philip asked, smirking.

“Your dad asked _you,_ not _me_.” Theo snickered.

“Fine….” Philip turned back to his parents. “One rule was to never flirt with her, two, don't let her get imprisoned, three not to treat her like she was any less than me, and four to do as she said.” 

Theo gave him a meaningful look, and he stared back, his gaze clouded with worry. 

“Mar, Gus, Sal, Joe and Annie,” she murmured, and Philip nodded.

“Mom. We need to go get her siblings,” he begged.

Alexander was staring at Theo. “What’s your father’s name, Theo?”

Theo looked up slowly. “Aaron Burr,” she mumbled. 

Alexander’s eyes flashed with recognition. “...you should have been living on castle grounds.”

“What?!” Theo yelled.

“Your father was one of my advisors.” Alexander’s smile turned bitter. “But after your mother died, he resigned and left. I was wondering what happened to his children. The six of you should have grown up in the advisor’s wing of the castle, with you training to be Philip’s advisor.”

“WHAT?!” Theo and Philip yelled in unison.

“You and your siblings could move in now. If you'd like,” Alexander added, and Theo nodded quickly.

“Yes!” she yelled, punching the air, then letting out a squeak when the motion pulled her stitches.

The king promised to make arrangements for her siblings to be brought to the castle, and left the room, leaving Theo and Philip alone with Eliza. 

“So, you’ve had it pretty rough, haven't you, hon?” she asked Theo gently.

Theo shrugged uncomfortably. “Others have it way worse.” 

“That doesn't mean your life wasn't hard, sweetie.” Eliza leaned down and brushed her lips across Theo’s forehead, then moved over and did the same to Philip.  
\--

Theo’s siblings had arrived a few hours later, all immediately swarming Theo. She had simply laughed, asking if they had gotten to the castle alright.

“Yeah! We were really confused when the castle people came up to our house and told us to pack ‘cause we were moving to the castle!” Anne squealed. “Wait! I live in a castle! Oh my god! I live it an actual freaking castle! It's like I'm a princess or something!”

“We act’ull’ liv’ here now?” Mary asked in awe.

“Yeah,” Theo grinned. “No more stealing to eat, kids!”

Her siblings all cheered loudly at that, and Philip groaned as he woke up. “Could you guys be any louder?” he asked sarcastically.

“Sorry,” Theo snickered, “is the itty bwitty baby pwincess sweepy?” she asked in a patronizing voice.

“Shut up Theo,” Philip mumbled sleepily. “If anyone here is the itty bitty princess, 'tis you, short stack.”

“I'm not that short!” Theo protested, throwing her hands up into the air.

“Theo,” Sally started slowly, “you are pretty short.”

“Yeah. You're really freaking short. I'm only twelve and I'm taller than you,” John grinned cheekily.

“And I'm fourteen and taller,” Sally added.

“And I-” Augustine started, but was cut off by Theo.

Theo chuckled and shook her head. “Okay, okay, I'm short! I get it!” 

Angie came running into the room yelling excitedly. “Other kids in the castle! Pip! Other kids!”

Philip laughed, “Yes, Ang, I've heard.” He pointed at Theo’s siblings, whom Angie had obliviously run past.

“Hi!” Mary giggled, Anne and Sally waving.

Angie’s face lit up. “Hi new best friends!” she yelled, grabbing Mary’s hand and running. The two older girls exchanged glances, waved at Theo and chased after Mary and Angie.

“Why aren't there any older boys here?” John grumbled. 

“Hello?” Philip waved his arm.

“Yeah, but you don't count ‘cause you’re Dossie’s boyfriend or something,” Augustine sighed.

“Wha-” Philip and Theo both yelled.

“Don't act like you two aren't always making kissy-faces at each other,” Augustine continued.

“We don't!” Theo shrieked, glaring at her brothers.  
\--

Aside from that one incident, Theo’s siblings moving into the castle was going perfectly, and as the weeks went on, they were all getting more and more used to living like royalty. Literally. 

Mary had been caught several times snatching anything that shimmered, and had always been surprised that she didn't get slapped, or at least screamed at. Theo herself had been having a hard time breaking the habit of sneaking little bits of food into her napkin for her siblings, and the others were all trying not to take anything without asking, but they'd grown up in a world where if they didn't take it, they couldn't have it.

Eliza had practically adopted Theo’s siblings, and Mary had even accidentally called Eliza mom on several occasions. It had been amazing to see how the queen lit up at being called mom, and stopped Mary from apologizing. 

There was, apparently, a major event coming up. Philip’s eighteenth birthday. In other words, his coronation.

The day of the coronation was in two weeks, and Theo had no idea why people kept asking her about it. 

At this point, Theo was certain Philip was having people play a practical joke on her, because why in the actual hell would know who _Philip_ was taking as his date? And why did she care that she didn't know?

“Dosia!” Sally came running over to her. “C’mon! We get fancy dresses! And we get to have our hair done!” Sally grabbed Theo’s hand, dragging her through the hallways of the castle to her room.

Theo had decided she hated fancy dresses.

Sure, her sisters looked adorable in theirs, but Theo just looked awkward. She hated these dresses. So far, she had tried three on, one pink (and waaaaaaay to short), one green (eh, it was okay, but it fit her weird), and a purple dress (that one had brought back memories of her mother’s death and she had barely managed to get it on). 

The maid who had been put in charge of Theo, Francis, sighed. “So, you liked the color of the green dress, but not the fit, and the fit of the purple dress? We can work with that.”

“Really? I can just suck it up and wear the green one, Fran,” Theo muttered, twining her fingers together.

Francis snorted loudly, and grabbed all three of the dresses. “You have to be comfortable,” Francis leaned forward and glanced to the sides before she continued, “because rumor has it that Philip wants you to be his date.”

Theo felt her face flush, and Francis nodded as if this confirmed something. “You do like him!”

“W-what?! No I don't, Fran!” Theo yelped, waving her hands around as if to banish the crazy notion.

“Whatever. Let's start on your hair.” Francis was back to acting all professional, as she started to mess with Theo’s hair, but Theo could see the mischievous twinkle in her eyes.

“We could cover it like you normally do? Just with a new scarf?” Francis suggested.

“Sounds great to me,” Theo admitted, running a hand through her hair.

“Well, now that that's done, we should go actually do something,” Francis groaned, grabbing Theo’s wrist. “I hear that there are some pretty cool plays in the playhouse.”

“Fine!” Theo giggled, starting to run, dragging Francis with her.

“Theo!” Theo stopped, nearly tripping at the sound of Philip’s voice.

“Yeah, Pip?” she asked, turning to face him.

“Two things. One, should I send Susan and Polly invitations to the coronation as a thank you for helping me?” Philip asked quietly, wringing his hands together as if he was nervous about something or another. Theo couldn’t imagine what, but she knew the signs of anxiety.

“They’d love that,” Theo smiled wistfully.

“Great! And second, ah, would you… um,” Philip’s face had flushed to a deep scarlet, “would you… would you…. would you do me the honor of… of being my date?”

“I- yeah, of course!” Theo squeaked out, a grin lighting her face. _That’s what he was stressing about._

“Told you,” Francis whispered to Theo, then turned and yelled, “DAD! DAD! DAAAAAAD! I WAS RIGHT! YOU WERE WRONG! PAY UP, OLD MAN! YOU OWE ME FIFTY BUCKS!” Francis proceeded to sprint down the hall, yelling.

Theo and Philip glanced at one another for a moment and both burst into unrestricted laughter. 

“Th-that was amazing,” Theo giggled, punching Philip’s arm.

“‘M sorry I turned into a stuttering mess,” he chuckled, dragging his hand down his face.

“Yeah, well. Anyways. You'll be needing Polly and Susan's last names, right?” she asked, and Philip nodded. “Polly Jefferson, and Susan-well Susan technically has two last names- Reynolds and Lewis. So, it'd be easier to find Polly.”

“Alright, I'll keep that in mind.” Philip nodded slowly. “See you later, Theo.”

\---

The day of the coronation was full of people rushing around, obviously stressed. Philip was twitching his hands nervously. As of today, he would be the king of a country. 

At least he’d have Theo as his advisor. She’d keep him from going power crazy. Not that he thought he would go power mad, though.

“Pip, honey, stop pacing. You're going to be fine.” His mother’s words broke him from his trance.

“I… what if I fail everyone, mom?! What if-”

“-Honey. You've been training for this day your entire life. And if you mess up? You fix it. That's all you can do, darling.” His mother wrapped him in her arms, pressing her lips against his head.

“I think that you're exactly what this kingdom needs,” she promised.

“Thank you, mom,” he smiled at her. 

“That's what I'm here for, sweetheart.” She cupped his cheek with a hand for a moment, then removed it and handed Philip the customary robe.

“Thank you,” he muttered, accepting it and wrapping around his shoulders.

“I'm going to go sit down. Wait until the priest sends someone to get you to come out. After that, you know what to do.” Eliza kissed his cheek one last time, before making her way into the no doubt elegantly decorated ballroom.

The next few minutes felt like several eternities, and Philip paced for the entirety of them.

When the doors opened the smallest amount, and a kid, the priest’s apprentice, stepped through, Philip shot to his side. “Do we go now?”

“Um,” the kid started, “I was told to count to one hundred before walking in with you.” He shuffled apologetically.

“Oh,” Philip muttered.

“I'm at thirty,” the kid assured him, “it's almost time.”

“Ninety eight, ninety nine, one hundred. Good luck, your majesty.” The boy bowed before opening the doors and ushering Philip inside. 

As he began to walk, everyone stood up. Then the choir started singing. Philip kept walking, looking for Theo, but trying not to be obvious. When he finally caught her eye, she grinned, and he found himself relaxing as she mouthed ‘keep walking, tall ass.’ 

He bit back a chuckle and walked the last few steps to the dais, where the priest was waiting. The priest gestured at Alexander, Eliza, and Theo, and they all stood, mounting the dais themselves. 

Theo linked her arm with his, following Eliza’s example. 

“Do you, Alexander James Hamilton, king of the great kingdom of Nevis hereby allot your crown?” The priest spoke clearly, not a trace of nervousness in his words.

“I do.” Philip’s father lifted the crown from his head, handing it to the priest, then stepping down the steps of the dais, stopping on the last step.

“Do you, Philip Cortlandt Hamilton humbly undertake your birthright of the crown of the glorious kingdom of Nevis?” the priest continued, and Philip took a deep breath before responding. 

“I do.”

“Do you swear to protect this kingdom and it's people to the end of your life?”

“I do.” Philip found himself extremely proud of how little his voice shook. 

“Then I, with the power invested in me by our God in Heaven above, I crown you king of Nevis. Serve your people well.” The priest placed the crown on Philip’s head. “Long live the king!” he proclaimed, and the cheer was repeated by everyone in the ballroom.

“Let's go eat,” Theo mumbled, moving her hand from Philip’s arm to his hand.

“I think we should grab Fran, Polly, and Susan first,” Philip suggested, peering through the crowd to find their friends.

“Is it a good idea to introduce them? Or are we just gonna end up with them all getting a room together?” Theo mumbled, a small smile on her face.

“Well, I think that it's too late to change history,” Philip sighed, nudging Theo and pointing at Susan, Polly, and Francis.

“Oh god. They're going to start a world war,” Theo joked, grabbing Philip’s hand and dragging him over to their three friends.

“Well I should hope they don't!” Philip laughed, allowing himself to be lead over to the group of girls.

“Yeah, me too.” Theo grinned as they walked the last few steps to their friends. Their _drunk_ friends.

Susan was obviously the most drunk, if not the only one drunk out of the three. She was giggling, her face was flushed, and from what Philip had heard, her speech was slurred. “‘M no’ drun’!” She was laughing uncontrollably, snorting softly as she spoke.

“Theo! Philip!” Polly was the first to notice them, and slung an arm over their shoulders. 

“Are you three drunk already?” Theo asked, smirking.

“Yes,” Polly answered easily.

“No!” Francis argued.

Susan was just giggling awkwardly, finishing her drink. As she did so, she slung an arm around Polly’s waist.

“So,” she started in a drunkenly flirty voice. “Di’ it hur’ when you fell from Hea’en?” 

Polly rubbed a hand down her face in exasperation. “Sweetie, I really wish you weren't a blackout drunk,” she murmured in exasperation, and Francis chuckled as she heard.

“Are you single? Or are you two da’ing?” Susan slurred.

“Sweetie, I'm not single.”

“O-oh…” Susan mumbled, tears beginning to pool in her eyes.

“Sweetie, you're not single either,” Polly whispered.

Susan turned to Francis looking stricken. “Are we da’ing?”

Francis bent over giggling, “No! Nope!”

Susan turned back to Polly. “So w’re da’ing? Ca’ we da’e ‘er too? I like her lots.” She strung an arm over Polly’s shoulder, using her girlfriend to keep herself upright.

Francis, Polly, Theo, and Philip exchanged bewildered glances. 

“Ah, should Pip and I… go? Let you figure some stuff out?” Theo suggested awkwardly.

“Um.. yeah, that'd be great. Congrats on being king or whatever, Philip,” Polly mumbled.

“Thanks, Polly,” Philip called, getting a wave in return. 

Philip and Theo had quickly been found by Philip’s aunts. All four of them. The youngest, Catherine, was only two years older than Philip and Theo themselves. The next oldest, Cornelia, was six years older. Then came Peggy, then Angelica. 

Catherine had pulled Philip to the side the moment Theo was distracted with questions. “Is she your girlfriend?” she demanded, a fierce interrogator when it came to her nephew’s love life, it seemed.

Philip shrugged helplessly. “I don't know. We’ve never gone on a date.”

His aunt sighed dramatically. “Well, I like her.” She thought for a moment. “Your mother does too.”

“So do I,” Philip affirmed, looking sheepish, “so we should save her from Angelica and Peggy, shouldn't we?”

“Yeah, they're probably gonna start asking awkward questions soon.” His aunt slung an arm around his shoulder as they walked back to the others. “I missed you, dork.”

“I missed you too Kat,” Philip grinned.

“-you from?” Angelica was asking Theo as they walked up.

“Oh, uh, well I'm from the western area of the kingdom. It's a rather small community, I guess.” Theo shrugged, looking uncomfortable under the rapid fire questions from Philip’s aunts.

“Huh. That's nice, I guess,” Peggy smiled at Theo, and Theo grinned nervously.

“Yeah, nice…,” Theo let her voice trail off.

Philip slipped an arm around Theo’s shoulders, cutting off the conversation with a “Hello, Aunt Peggy, Angelica, Cornelia.” 

Cornelia, the newest to the Schuyler tradition of interrogating family members’ dates, looked faintly embarrassed, but Peggy and Angelica’s faces gave nothing away. 

“Pip,” Angelica smiled at him, “we were just getting to know Theo, here.”

“I'd noticed,” Philip deadpanned, shooting Theo an apologetic glance.

Theo cracked a smile, “It was a pleasure to meet you.” She curtsied to Philip’s aunts, then grabbed Philip’s hand and started to walk away. 

“I'll talk to you later!” Philip called to his aunts, pretending not to notice, and pretending not to blush when Catherine made an obscene gesture.

Theo led the way out of the ballroom, and kept walking. She continued on until they reached a small garden. Or, what used to be a garden, anyways. The once neat rose bushes had branches sprawling everywhere, the trees was overgrown and sagging, and the grass was yellowed. Lilies and violets grew rampant, spotted with day lilies in a few spots.

 _It's beautiful in a sort of eerie way,_ Philip supposed.

“This was my mom's garden from when she and dad lived here,” Theo answered the unasked question, her voice quiet yet clear in the peaceful quiet of the abandoned garden.

“...and I thought I'd been everywhere in this castle,” Philip laughed, the sound soft.

“Well, I guess I'll just have to make sure that you've been everywhere, then,” Theo chuckled. She started walking again, beckoning for Philip to follow. He allowed her to lead, a small smile gracing his face.

“So, you've been fixing this place?” Philip asked as they arrived in a small area where the bushes were neatly trimmed.

“Yeah. Francis has been helping too,” she smiled wistfully.

“That's amazing,” Philip smiled down at Theo.

“Thanks, dork,” Theo laughed gently, looking up at him, when her face fell. “Why the hell are you so tall?” she demanded, tone good natured.

“I dunno, genetics?” Philip answered smugly.

“Ah, genetics,” Theo grimaced, “the reason I'm shorter than my twelve year old brother.”

“I think it's cute,” Philip mumbled, his face flushing red. “I… I guess I forgot to tell you earlier, but you look amazing,”

Theo's eyes widened slightly at the compliment. “Well I think that it's kinda annoying, ‘cause I can't reach anything. And, uh, thank you.”

Philip laughed loudly at that statement. “I'm pretty sure you'll find a way to reach some stuff. And I can grab the other stuff for you,” he offered.

She grinned sneakily up at him. “My knight in shining armor.” 

Philip laughed again, a smile quirking across his lips. He leaned down towards Theo, who looked faintly confused at this point, but wasn't shoving him away, _that was possibly a good sign._

Philip leaned forward a little bit, just barely brushing his lips with hers as if he hadn’t completely thought the action out. He jumped back immediately, apologies already on his lips.

So, of course he was surprised when she grabbed his tie.

“Do that again, idiot,” Theo’s smile was small, and her cheeks were bright pink. “I think that I liked it.”

She pulled on his tie a bit more, then connected their lips again. Neither one wanted to stop any time soon.


	2. Update!!!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yo! Please read!

Hey! So I'm considering writing either a prequel with Theo, or a sequel, or some sort of... just another work in this universe? Tell me if you're interested, and what you'd like to see!

**Author's Note:**

> If you made it this far, you're freaking amazing! Thanks for reading! I hope you liked it!  
> -


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